Sunday, May 13, 2012

Google Paris

Dear Google,
First let me say thank you, merci, for the Mother's Day doodle.
It's adorable.  And you even went so far to make a different one for England, l'Angleterre.

Again, adorable.
It's not Mother's Day in France yet or I am sure you would've made one for la Fête des Mères also.  I look forward to it on le 27 mai
Now, to the real point of my letter. 
Yesterday, I went to my  mailbox and found a letter from you.

I was so excited.  My mind and heart were racing.  My imagination was running wild.  All I could come up with was that you had read my blog, you had learned how much I love to google, you had even found out that I teach my middle school French students to conjugate the verb googler (je google, tu googles, il google, etc.  passé composé:  nous avons googlé, futur: vous googlerez, imparfait:  ils googlaient) and you were writing to offer me a job.  And not just any job, a job in your Paris office.
The one that you opened on Avénue de l'Opéra.  You know, Sarko was there.  You probably celebrated with a bottle of champagne.
Reading some of my blog posts, you picked up on the fact that I not only love to google, but I would love to be a professional googleuse in France. 
But alas, when I opened the envelope, I found a very nice gift card for $100 in free advertising for my business and a letter explaining how registering my business on Google would bring me loads of customers.  The catch is, my dear Google, is that I do not have a business to advertise.  I've thought about turning The Sabbatical Chef into a business.  A book, notecards, travel tours, kitchen do-dads, cookbooks, aprons, kitchen towels.  However, I already have a day job, teaching French, to support my blogging and traveling to France habits.  And to pay Son #2's college tuition.  And I do love my students.  But, please, s'il vous plaît, do not let that stop you from recruiting me for your Paris office.  I could do any number of jobs-- kitchen manager or snack chef or team mom (I have lots of experience here) or office blogger (how cool would it be to have a blog dedicated to how great it is to work in the Paris Google office-- maybe you already have one?  I didn't see it.  Maybe I should google it...) or receptionist or cleaning lady (I do know how to clean les toilettes in French after my experience in Arles) or tour guide for visitors.  I love food, cheese in particular, I am happy, I would love to get paid to have fun, I know how to work hard and play hard, I am fluent in French, love Paris and know it pretty well, I am a team player but also self-motivated, and I truly believe that Google has made my life much more interesting.  (What on earth did I do before I could googler?) 
Oh, by the way, I love the guy's cow photos!  I bet they are les vaches normandes whose delicious milk is used to make that yummy Camembert on your cheese tray.
Anyway, I'm just saying.  You couldn't go wrong hiring moi.  The Ex-Ex would love to become a professional Parisian boules player.  I would support him wholeheartedly.  
Think about it and get back to me here on the blog or at my gmail account.  Send me an application by Google apps, if you wish. 
À bientôt!

Bon appétit, Google!

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